Jump Start # 3542

Proverbs 31:10 “An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels.”

Our verse today sets off the section that is commonly the virtuous woman. These are the words of a mother to her son. She is, as most mothers are, concerned about the type of woman that her son would marry. Among these beautiful words we find the godly character of compassion and service. Nothing is said about what she looks like, who her daddy is, or how much money she brings to the marriage. She is one who cares for her household, her servants and others. Kindness, optimism and faith run richly through those powerful descriptions.

It occurred to me a while back that while she may be virtuous, what about him? So often a person wants to find “a good catch” for marriage, while they have little to offer. In fact, they may be nothing more than a ugly ole’ worm that catches the attention of someone who is such a greater moral and spiritual fiber than they are. If there is a virtuous woman, then there ought to be a virtuous man. And, together, when those two get together, they make the virtuous couple.

In a wedding recently, I precented the concept of the virtuous couple, based upon Proverbs 31. Here is what it looks like:

An excellent couple who can find…

Their value to each other and to the kingdom is worth far more than jewels

Their hearts trust each other and there is no limit to the good that they can do

They labor with joy, and are they are generous, kind, and thoughtful to each other and to those around them

They are busy, engaged in the wellbeing of life…

Their faith in the Lord has clothed them in righteousness, dignity and honor

They are a delight to be around

They teach with kindness upon their lips

Together, they smile at the future, knowing that the Lord is with them

Many couples have done nobly, but you excel them all…

Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,

But a couple who fears the Lord, they shall be praised

When two righteous people build their lives on love, trust and the Lord, great things will happen. They will be an illustration for others to follow. They will be busy in the kingdom and the wellbeing of life. Moms and dads will point their growing children to look at such a couple and to model the goodness and faith that they manifest. This is as the Lord would have it to be.

For this to work, we must teach our young people to look beyond the exterior of a person. This Proverb states, “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain”. One can put enough paint on a wall to cover up a crack, but the crack is there. And, we can cover up character flaws with makeup, expensive clothing, fine automobiles, and smiles. Selfishness is selfishness. And, it will manifest itself in a marriage very quickly. Short tempers, arrogance, shallow faith, immaturity rises quickly to the surface in a marriage.

I’m seeing a pattern among many young Christians that if you disagree with them, they will cut you off. This is not a Biblical stance, just an emotional and mental stance. If you do not agree, you are ignored, shunned and left behind. This spirit is hurting many families. This spirit is driving a wedge in some congregations. This has nothing to do with someone living immorally or ungodly. It’s nothing more than immaturity and the spirit that says, “I don’t like you.”

And, we must realize there is nothing noble or virtuous about that spirit. Such a heart would never go to the home of a tax collector as our Lord did. Such a heart would never be found in Samaria, as our Lord was. Surrounded by only those who agree with you is not a healthy place to be. Constantly being feed ‘you are great,’ doesn’t help one grow. One needs to listen to critics, even if they hurt. One needs to consider the wisdom of others, even if they do not agree. Fickle friends who only tell you want you want to hear are not really friends at all.

The virtuous have a heart that is like the Lord. What a blessing to find a virtuous couple.

Roger